I know what you’ve been thinking: “I wonder when Pirate George is gonna roll out the predictable standards?” Well… that time is now. But one awesome and easy pick will not make the cut. Even though the surrealy odd “Peace on Earth/Little Drummer Boy” should be listened to over and over, something else needs to be mentioned. Mentioned in all caps, in fact.
DAVID BOWIE DID AN EERIE VERSION OF “HEROES” ON THE BING CROSBY 1977 CHRISTMAS SPECIAL. BING CROSBY DIED A MONTH LATER.
Look at this thing:
Bowie in shadow and shade, looking like heroin chic Jamie Lee Curtis dressed in American Apparel; tryptic Bowie faces singing to each other; Adrian Belew squonk as Bowie does the mime-make-out routine; Bowie trying to soften the performance edges by doing family-friendly mime standards, but coming off looking like a French short film about cyborgs.
There is some debate about whether or not Bing Crosby even knew who the fuck David Bowie was. There is no debate, however, that if Bing Crosby saw the post-production results, where it seemed to encourage the girl to grow up to be just like Major Tom, he would have stepped away from Death’s door long enough to beat the Hell out of someone. Probably one of his kids(just kidding! He would have beat his kids up regardless of the video).
Merry Christmas, readers. Jesus, and Merry Christmas. You can guess the ones coming next. Music is the best.